poetry
check out the void collection over in the sidebar!!!
fuck this dude in particular
I dont like you, man
Let me just say it, out loud, so everyone knows
I dont like you
I dont care about your neuroses, you never cared about mine
Im too much to deal with, you say
But you never even tried
I put in the hours, the effort, the time
What did i get back?
A fucking insult
A lie
A coward who wont look me in the face as he ends my life
You say i cant move on
But you never told me it was over
How was i supposed to get the hint
If you kept telling me its fine
crazy
I know my fear means nothing to you
I know, i know
I know what i've done is unforgivable
I know, i know
But why put me in this position in the first place
Why cast me in the role of the crazy eyed rambler
When all I wanted was the truth?
We were never going to be beautiful
But did we have to turn out so ugly?
I know, i know
Youve moved past it
I know, i know
I’m the one holding on
no
I like saying goodbye
And no
And i wont
And never again
I wasnt able to say those things for so long
Even when i want to do something, it feels better knowing i can object and noone minds
memory
i'm too tired to cry, yet i do anyway.
too proud to be scared, yet i am regardless.
would you like to know a secret? on the backs of all my photos, i write what happened in them, in case i forget. (and i always do)
the worst part, is sometimes i forget i've forgotten. i forget that everything's gone, that my memory is empty and barren, that i contain nothing, give nothing, have nothing, am nothing.
sometimes, i really believe i have everything.
i hate poems
I hate poems
Hate cute little allusions and alliteration
Cant stand how it makes art of my suffering
Hurts my heart the way i cant seem to stop
Turning bruises into prose
Bleeding to ink
Thoughts wide open to the world im writing for.
If i could silence my brain for a second
We wouldn't be here, would we.
fuzzy religion
I think one part of myself is deeply religious
But i can never touch her
I feel the way she feels,
Still i can never touch her
I see her-our-god in every flash of light
Still i can never touch
As close as we are, sharing thoughts, feelings, love
I can never get close enough to really feel
The heat of her devotion
Get close enough to call it mine
Its in my head but isnt mine
I can never touch her
the cardinal poem
i love the red bird
flash of blood across a yellow blue aching sky
something new that brings me back to focus like a shock of pain
to see him is to invite luck into your home
its a secret we share, me and the red bird,
a secret that whispers ive forgotten what it means to be ok
but all i need to do is kiss him
and fortune will flow freely from my palms and eyes
like blood across a bruised sky
noticing a statue on the way to work
Its blue outside.
Despite the frost on your fingertips
You look the same as ever,
In your naked blue-green-black skin.
You stand rigid and bare in the face of passing seasons.
Now,
The air is cold and the plants surrounding your raised arms have
Long died
The world is empty
Still,
There you are, silent, still and unwavering.
an unbothered exhibitionist
Baring your tarnished body
For the small beauty it brings a stranger
Being beautiful does not suit me-diana
Nice flowery sentences
Strung together
To make a daisy chain of lace
And pretty explanations
But feelings are actually,
Usually,
Quite gross.
Jubilation can destroy you in the same breath it saves
So what is the point, then
Of making it pretty?
Lace and roses dont fit right, even though i try.
Being clean, quiet, beautiful
Is all i want,
But these emotions creep their way in like weeds every time
And steal it all away.
Everytime it becomes too much,
And then im writing for you again
Instead of myself.
glutton for punishment
Something evil exists here
I need to be punished
I need to be punished
Need blood on my bat
And my teeth
And my skin
I need to be punished
Take my hands away
Before i use them
To take your head in them and
Never let go
how many times do i have to say it: i dont want to be your friend
Speaking is a curse
Made of warm honey,
Love, and promises of safety
Community
Speaking is a curse
That gives away all of you
To the guise of camaraderie
It starts with agreement
Starts with a chance to be included,
Part of something,
Then continues like in a trance
Before you know it-
One secret,
Then another
Pulled bloody like teeth
Into the hands of those waiting beneath
They want more, they need it,
So they pull you apart
Clumsily,
Holding your still beating heart
Now that they know you youll never get out
If only youd known to just shut up.
glutton for punishment pt 2
Defenestrate me baby!
I need something bad to happen
The only way ill keep my head on
Is if you
Cut
It
Off.
new pet owner
There is a dog in my house
I dont have to feed her, she does not bite.
I give her treats, small things, scraps of anything I find
And she lays her head on my lap
At the end of a long day.
the trust in her eyes is more than i deserve
Ive never had a dog before
Never wanted to keep something more than myself alive, safe
I stay up while she sleeps at the foot of my bed,
Frantically searching for answers:
How to take care of a dog
Am i doing this right
What will make her leave
There is a dog in my house
And it is terrifying how much i fought it,
How much i cant imagine life without her now
It is terrifying how much she isn't
myself
i dont know who you are
(you dont have to be everything)
and i dont know what this is
(you dont have to be anything)
but there is solace in the existance of the we,
of the other
i am this for you
nothing you dont have to be you arent
that is survival, that is love, that is family
i am so scared, thats family
carry my burdens and hate me until we are more than the sum of our parts, that is family
you dont have to be anything but this
i cannot be everything so i am nothing made many